Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Family Ties...

My GPA that has been visiting us from OR just left, and it feels like it is the last time I will ever see him. Not to be all dramatic about it, but he is getting up there in age and we do live very far from each other. The time we were able to spend with him has been so special. My GPA and I have a bond that is indescribable. I loved watching him get to know my children, to see them fall in love with their GGPA. Every moment will forever be a sweet memory. I pray that he gets to his next destination safe and that he remembers to call and let me know.. ;)

Family really is such a special thing, something so many of us take for granted. I really admire the way GPA stays in contact with so many family and friends and they with him. It makes me want to be better at it myself. I got in contact with my grandparents from OR in 2003 and since then have gotten very close to the rest of the family. I am so very proud to be apart of something so amazing, a group of people that will do anything to help someone in need, to offer all the love they have. They have taken my family and myself under their wing and loved us like we have always been apart of them.

I have been blessed with a lot of family members throughout my life. Three amazing and interesting Aunts on my dad's side, all women that have taught me something special about life. Grandparents that made growing up a lot of fun, introducing me to new experiences.
On my mom's side I enjoyed numerous Holidays playing with cousins and learning new crafts with my Grandma.
I have a Brother that I can't help but love and a Sister that I look up to so much.
I have an Aunt and Uncle and cousins that love me all the way from OR.
I have an amazing whole other family on my husbands side, all of who have accepted and treated me with love for the past seven years. My in laws are fantastic, I really got lucky there! And a new Sister to hangout and share life lessons with. Grannys and Papas, cousins galore...I love them all!

So many people have closely touched my life, Do they know just how much?

Loving family members spread all throughout the country that I need to make more of an effort to keep in contact with. To let them know just how much they mean to me. If I have learned anything, it is that life is short and I have a lot of love to give.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Momma's night out

I am feeling a little bit random tonight, (more so than usual) I apologize ahead of time...

So I learned some thing about myself tonight... I found out that I really enjoy going to movies by myself. Which kind of scares me. I have always depended on others to keep me company, to have a good time. I was surprised at how comfortable I was standing in line for my ticket although I did get a little nervous when I was asked what movie I was seeing, I drew a blank and kind of stuttered as I said Bridesmaids. I even treated myself to snacks. Standing in that line was harder, I had to keep telling myself to stay put, not to escape to the darkness of the theater where it wouldn't be as obvious that I was there alone. There were a group of women there, maybe 4 or 5 in their 40's or so. A group of women that you could tell had all been friends for awhile, loud and fun and having a good time. It reminded me of the days when I would go out with the girls and harass our waiters... I was envious of these women because they were all there together, laughing and enjoying each others company. By the time I sat down and started stuffing my face with my expensive snacks I was feeling better about it.  By the time the movie started I had forgotten  I was even by myself. I laughed out loud and almost cried a few times (probably not a movie I should have watched by myself since I have actually been kicked out of a wedding) but over all had a really great time. Thankfully I had enough self respect not to get up and dance at the end when Wilson Phillips was singing ( I forgot how much I loved her !) and walked out with confidence.
The movie itself made me do a lot of thinking though. About what kind of friend I am. I wont go into the movie details, I don't want to ruin it for anyone. I want the kind of friendship that they have in the beginning of the movie, I want that friend to eat lunch wiht and make silly impressions with, to sing and dance horrible with...
My best friend is  9 hrs 16 mins / 533.89 miles away from me, not exactly the hangout on the weekends kind of situation (although we do talk most everyday) I have friends, even a few good ones ;) but I still don't do much to reach out to them. I used to be the one to initialize plans and dates. I was a go getter! But now I have realized that I am a recluse that waits for things to happen to her. Where did that go getter go? Did becoming a stay at home mom change me that much? Do I just use it as an excuse to push people away? I'm not that good of a friend, not like I used to think I was. I think becoming a mom made me sort of selfish. I forget to ask others how they are or ask about their lives...I think that's why I enjoy blogging so much, I get to get all my thoughts out  but don't have to listen to anyone Else's. That's horrible! I do not want to be this person! I love people, I love to talk, I love to have a good time. I'm a needy friend, the type that needs her calls answered or at least returned. The one that likes to text everyday or every other day, just about random things. I share personal stuff, I wear my feelings on my sleeve and have been known to get my feelings hurt easily. I just want to make room in my life for an everyday friend like in the movies...

Sunday, May 15, 2011

"I think about you constantly, whether it's with my mind or my heart."

Quote by Albany Bach Reid

Are you  missing someone?
 I have been in a constant state of "missing" in the past week. Friends separated by distance, friends separated by time...Loved ones gone from this world, missed opportunities, babies growing into children... memories hitting me in waves. I have even missed writing to you. So here is a recap of recent happenings:

I took a break from my 31 days to clean challenge, with washing the kitchen windows left to do. I will pick back up tomorrow morning.

My GPA came to visit from OR, traveling by himself since losing the love of his life last summer...Seeing him enjoy the time with his great grandchildren and listening to his stories has been so precious. Memories to hold onto for life. I miss the time I didn't get with my GMA, something I can not help feeling bitter about. The few memories I do have are sweet but much fewer than I need.

Of course the one person that I always miss is my best friend, a real true friend but distance keeps us from seeing each other more than a couple times a year. I do look forward to the times we hangout but often wonder what it would be like to be able to plan weekly get together... 

I have a few friends close by that time and life has just pushed us apart, some I miss, some I think I just miss the idea of having that friend to call up whenever I want. I am thankful for the ones I have but I find myself not trying to get close to anyone anymore, even when all I want is a girls night out every once in awhile. I never pick up the phone to make it happen; I can't keep waiting for it to happen for me...

Everyday I watch as my children grow and change right before my eyes. I know this is life and I should embrace it, most days I do... but lately I have wondered just where the time went. And did i make the most of it. Will I look back and know that I did everything I could to make each memory a great one for them? I look forward to each milestone: Grant learning something new each day, Lela about to start crawling, but will always miss the baby in them.

Speaking of growing up, I want to send a shout out to my amazing Sister in Law who just graduated from college. What an awesome accomplishment, I am so proud of her! It does make me feel a little old, and a little sad that I didn't take the opportunity to do the same when I had an easier chance at it. But I do know that when and if the time is right I will know it and pursue an education. For now I will just be proud of her and do my best to help my children pursue theirs.

Mothers day was amazing this year. I truly enjoyed every moment and memory we made together! It made me think of the few years that I would cry because all I wanted to be able to do was celebrate as a mother. I am so thankful for this opportunity! My gift this year: a new wallet! I found this on sale at our local grocery store, a super great buy and just had to have it!

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Hidden Treasures...

Check out my fabulous find from the top of the refrigerator!

I woke up tired, sore and with the feeling of accomplishment this morning. I have been participating in a 31 day challenge to clean my home, 31 Days to Clean - Having a Martha House the Mary Way and today is my Day 4.
Yesterday involved some deep cleaning in the kitchen and I went nuts! I couldn't stop! I was fortunate to have a little more time to spare yesterday since my son goes to daycare 2 days a week and my daughter took a 3 hour nap. I also have been trying to double up on my days so that I can have more done by the time I have family coming in to stay next week.
So starting with the top of the refrigerator and ending up with the oven, I scrubbed and washed until my fingers were tired. I even ventured under the refrigerator finding half of the missing ABC magnets! My stove top was so gross, with the impossible stains around the burners ( we have and old gas stove) and the oven is not self cleaning...I did my best in the inside of the oven and called it good! But the outside looks all shiny and brand new!
Oh and I introduced my cabinets to Murphy's soap and they became good friends. I cleared a whole corner of junk mail and clutter of papers off of the counter and rearranged a couple drawers, even the "junk drawer". It was like I was nesting all over again! Today I plan on finishing up more in the kitchen, if my little ones cooperate...
This challenge is wonderful, the book is a must read! I have so much motivation to make my house a home, I have even cleaned up the dinner dishes every night, creating better habits for myself each day. Maybe I will get lucky and they will rub off on my husband and then my children some day ;)

                        I took advantage of some free time while my children played together to get a little scrubbing done...

Monday, May 2, 2011

Day 1.... Mondays are supposed to be lazy...

Day 1 and I am just now taking the time to start my challenge. Luckily it is an easy one for me because I already know the answer. The question is: Why Clean? I have to write a mission statement on why i want a clean home and why I want my home to be a haven. That way I will stay motivated to reach my goals. so here are the reasons I want a clean home in no certain order:

 I want my husband to come home to a stress free zone after work.
 I want to enjoy the time I have with my family in an uncluttered space.
 I want a healthy family.
 I want to be stress free when a guest arrives.
 I want a home that reflects who I want to be.
 I want to look back on each day and feel accomplished not only as a mother and wife, but also as a Homemaker, my chosen profession.

Today started out slow with a chance to sleep in and wonderful cuddle time with my baby girl. I had a great phone conversation with my favorite Aunt, and enjoyed the freedom of the day. Then my son came home from daycare sick with a fever, poor boy isn't feeling well. and it's been crazy ever since. Definitely one of those days that I wish I would have gotten up early to get the chores done so I could feel accomplished instead of lazy... So it's nap time and after jotting this down, I am going to straighten up the house a little so I feel better about it :) That's what Mondays are for right?

Sunday, May 1, 2011

May= Momma Makeover Madness!

I am determined to change and change for the better! So starting tomorrow, I will be doing the 31 Days to Clean - Having a Martha House the Mary Way cchallenge. It isn't just about having a clean house, it's about having a Happy Home. I am continually trying to live up to my Blog's name : the "Perfectly Content" part. I want to be able to enjoy my family and friends without the stress of the chores around the house. We can all live in unison!

I will also be working hard on my weight loss goal this month. I will be eating better and exercising more, all to feel good, be healthy and look Hot! I am thinking about a little hair change also... we will see!

This is going to be such a busy exciting month! My GPA from OR will be coming to visit in just over a week and my amazing sis in law is graduating from college! So I am grabbing ambition and motivation by the horns and not letting go until I am one Perfectly Content Busy Momma!